I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
