what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
