yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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