Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I'm eating all of the evidence.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
