i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
