Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
