Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
