I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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