Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
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