dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
