Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
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