Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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