Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
