ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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