Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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