He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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