My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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