I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
