how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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