is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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