KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
