Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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