She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
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