I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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