Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize