i just made my gag reflex go away.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Success! We fucked roommates!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize