belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
this hospital has no fireball
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
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