If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
