Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Say something about gay babies.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
