The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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