Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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