How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
