holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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