Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
