so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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