Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
