Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
You dont lie about slip and slides
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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