it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
