god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
