I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
