so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
