Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Why did my mother make you get naked?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize