no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
