I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
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