That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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