You just made me feel so damn special
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
