you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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