plz talk dirty to me
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize