Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
