I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
